Soaking in the comfort in this hard edged world. Cats seem to be in the know with self care. Make time to comfort, soothe and nourish the tender in you. ❤️
Who are you really? What makes you tick? Not what do you do for a living. Not who are you in relationship to others…(mother, son, sister, brother, wife, grandpa, etc.). I was asked to describe who I am. After much thought about why I think I’m in existence, I came up with this description.
I am love. I am light. I am truth, real and raw. Both colorful and dark. I am synchronous with growth, death, rebirth following the cycles of nature. I am my own best friend, confidante and lover. I am sensual, funny and deep. I am a beautiful mix of human and spirit. Light and heavy. An unchanged core of varying human experience, I am a beautiful mess.
How would you answer? What would you say?
Yesterday was an emotional day for me. The purging hurt so good. The death of an antiquated pattern, shedding my dumb-suit. My beauty radiating blissfully from under the decaying camouflage. Reflecting on how different I am today. It hit me hard. Like my heart was cracking open to love – love for myself. Continue reading “Retiring My Emotional Armor”
“It’s unbelievable how many ppl carry this around with them and then all of the sudden come out with – I was sexually abused as a kid. They go their whole life, carrying it around and never say anything”. Continue reading “Shhhhhh”
OH on a Sunday morning. Warmed by the Spring sun, greeted by a worn out Winter smile. I aspire to relax into each hour. Making the most of the present moment. Recalling how I’ve crawled up the backside of a landfill to create space. Enough space in my life to let the warm sun IN to thaw my soul. Sunday restores the depleted/empty caverns carved by a less than satisfying week. A less than satisfying life. Our positive reserves may have run dry, our good intentions steam rolled.
Sunday’s are meant for replenishment, for celebration. Pregnant with possibilities, resetting intentions. We remember that everything works out, falls into place, everything. Clearing, cleansing minds for the coming week. Beginning anew. The privilege of a clean slate, a refresh. In deepest gratitude, Sunday.
Only write the pretty things. Speak in pretty tones, pretty word choice. Somehow REAL is no longer cool. Intolerable. Honesty must be extinguished, slaughtered alongside her sister, authenticity. Continue reading “Only Pretty Allowed Here”
Being with teens sometimes hurts my soul. Today I am upset with my gag order circumstances. Kinda goes against the grain of my -say it- fabric. I suck at keeping my mouth shut Continue reading “Right Church Wrong Pew”
What I know today is that I am doing the best I can with what I know at this moment. Listening to my body, getting my needs met and noticing, just noticing issues and problems. After all, the problems are usually not the big deal, it’s the way we FEEL about having a problem – this is the REAL problem.
Today I feel like I’m just watching life unfold. I’m not part of events and moments but just an observer. Dissociation is the order of the day. Now I have a clear choice… I can either beat myself up, try to figure out why, try to be something else (exercise, physical pain, substance, force grounding, etc..) and otherwise DO something about my dissociative state or I can accept that this is the order of the day. If I make it a big honkin deal then I’ve added to the original condition.
Today I will not shame myself, go into role, hide or otherwise catastrophize about what could have possibly taken over my brain and ability to feel deeply. Obviously, I have been triggered. Healthy, normal, life happening, right now, oh well.
And Thank-You, dissociation, my loveliest, oldest companion, for saving my young self from a complete mental breakdown. Happy Friday everyone.
It amazes me how differently humans react in a crisis. Continue reading “Cold & Broken”
We’ll do anything for a good Mom. When there was so much wrong in our childhoods, we need, now, to reparent ourselves and get what we’ve missed.
Bringing loving kindness to ourselves. Validation. Safety. Feeling comfortable really , deeply being seen. Celebrating our Aliveness. Feeling worthy.
Gift yourself these. Get whatcha need. Fill those holes. Anyways.
Picture credit to 9Gag.com