Celebrate · Human Spirit · Joy · persevere · validation

Joy

I began blogging about my journey in January 2018. I’m learning more with every entry, every encounter with my lovely readers. The joy I feel as I gain my 100th follower is palpable. I am thrilled that complete strangers would stop by and give me a chance. Amazing. Maybe what I have to say touches upon our common thread as humans – persevering anyway. Underneath it all we all just want to be seen, heard and considered. Considered worthy of love. So I will keep rolling out pieces of authentic experience when it comes to the human condition. I am honored to have you with me on this journey.  💜

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abuse · trauma · triggers

Just A Shell

Born into a family of dysfunction, I navigated my world the best I could, hoping to be loved, cherished, valued, held and heard. Instead I was met with disregard for my life, repeated, long-term invasion of my body, my innocence, violence disguised as love, safety/security masquerading as control. All at the hands of my parents and male siblings. I was doomed. A shell of a human. Existing in the dizzying cycle of being tossed around in the surf of life – only occasionally able to take a full breath, surface. Pieces of my personality chipped off, the tide taking them far off, away.  Never feeling the ground beneath my feet. Becoming dead inside, broken. Accepting the abnormal as normal. As violence, invasion came over me again and again I became familiar with rage. The rage that was growing inside of me. Rage that would never be recognized. Undercover. A secret rage, thoughts of revenge that would bring a sweet, savory smile to my perfect little-girl face. Continue reading “Just A Shell”