I can’t tell you how I’ve longed for someone to say, YES, YOU WERE RIGHT ALL ALONG!I always imagined that some day, some where, I would hear these kind and gentle words, ”You were born into some bullshit circumstances you poor thing. I’m so sorry. They are fucked up and treated you like a dog. Using you for their own entertainment, sucking the light out of you because you were born with so much more. You had the wisdom to see through the crazy – which they had no tolerance for…. I’m sooo sorry my dear.”
Let me tell ya, when you are the only one in your family of origin who sees through to the real story, the truth….well, that’s just pure crazy making in itself. After a while you just go along with the crowd and smile and act as if. AS IF everything was perfect, sane and normal. I am the best actress, I COULD FOOL ANYONE, trust me 😳. I learned from the best. I’d stare you straight in the eye and tell you whatever it is you want to hear. This does, I have to say, come in handy now and then….. LOL I can fuck with the best. Hahahaha and no-one would ever suspect a thing. Looking so sweet and unassuming can certainly be a blessing.
True validation is extremely hard to come by. But a couple of times this year I have been fortunate enough to be gifted some ACCIDENTAL validation. And I will tell you, it has healed some deep, deep wounds. To watch as others, in my extended family, are “treated” to the same circumstances that I experienced as a child – and see them freak the fuck out – words cannot express the fireworks inside of me…… I have no words that will do it justice. Just WOW. To have one of my abusers attempt to trample on my (adult) children’s physical boundaries – and see my children react with disgust and anger…..Completely and utterly priceless. Gifts, gifts, gifts, ggggggiiiiiiiffffttttttssssss!!!!!!
THIS, my friends…….is sweet validation. This is why I have chosen to leave my family of origin, protect myself, show myself loving kindness by not giving one ounce of my power, light and energy to a sick family system.
Are you fucking kidding me? – I could scream from the mountaintops!!!!! This is amazing. I am smiling so proudly as I write this. Big teeth smile, not a smirk! a full on smile from deep within.
My power chakra is smiling (I am powerful and will NEVER be owned). My root chakra is smiling (I am safe because I have made my circumstances safe). My heart chakra is smiling (I love myself enough to stay away from crazy and see this through). My throat chakra approves (I speak my truth and listen to wisdom from my higher self). My third eye chakra is dancing and celebrating (I know the truth and have clear vision and purpose). My crown chakra is open and connected with the Divine source of support.
This is personal. Validation is Queen. Don’t stop git it, git it. I have waited 20 years, TWENTY YEARS! for this Validation to show itself, 20 years. Woot, Woot. Did I mention 20 years LMAO.
Bring it. Can I have seconds, thirds??? Never ever ever ever ever ever give up on what you know is true. Even if you’re the only one who believes….then, my friends, it is even MORE important to persevere.