I can fabricate. Oh baby, can I fabricate the scariest circumstances as possible outcomes in my life. I mean, and it’s all in my mind. None of it EVER transpires anything like the scenario I’ve created! None of it EVER will! Things always work out for the best in the end. Things always work out for me – yet when I’m faced with difficult circumstances …I scare the shit out of myself. And I’m so fucking good at it. This is something I learned as a young child and perfected as I got older- we are all good at something, right? Lol.
In sitting and observing, noticing how I do this to myself today, I realized that although at one time (the scaring) was useful as a motivator to be prepared, organized, have a plan and keep me safe from harm, this is of absolutely no use to me as an adult and actually has me functioning from “fight or flight”. Not a peaceful way to exist. This is where anxiety lives. Future thinking keeps us out of the present moment.
Today just watching. Noticing. Remembering that everything always works out, everything. No need for an ambulance on speed dial.